Beaupedia

Human Under Construction

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Where I’ve Been, Where I’m Going

It’s been a while since I’ve updated, really just due to the rollercoaster ride that the last couple of months have been.

I “graduated” from the PHP program at Eating Recovery Center on October 16th and returned to work on October 25th. I was back to work for about a week before my grandmother died and I flew home for her funeral. Her death wasn’t entirely unexpected, we had a little bit of warning. She was also suffering from Alzheimer’s for the past nine years, and we were losing her slowly, then more rapidly the last 3 years or so. I am sad she is gone, and I am sad for my grandfather, a second time widower.

A week after getting back to work from my bereavement leave I got strep throat and was out for another week. Today marks my first full week of work in what seems like 6 months.

I’m currently outpatient at ERC, meeting with a therapist weekly, a psychiatrist monthly, and a dietitian when I can fit it in/afford it.

It hasn’t been very easy getting back into the “real world”, I have to admit. I miss the stability and the structure. I miss my friends. It’s also quite an experience being surrounded all day, every day with people who love you unconditionally and are fully dedicated to your recovery. I feel fortunate to have had the opportunity to focus on my thoughts, my feelings and my needs, as I did. It’s not something I think most of us make time for in our day to day lives. That sounds kind of absurd and selfish to say, but, it’s not. It’s absolutely the way it should be.

Forward, with lots and lots of gray. I’m done with black and white.